I'm thinking about calling a therapist
Now that someone loves me.
Sounds crazy right?
The last time I called one
It was because someone I loved left me.
This time, I'm not in pain.
I'm more nervous than anything...
Allowing love to slip through my fingers
Because I have no idea how to hold it.
Too good to be true.
I'm waiting for something bad to happen...
...Because, it always does.
What makes this situation any different?
Well, he does.
But that's not enough for me to put my guard down.
I want to love him harder.
He deserves it.
But I'm left with reminders; triggers.
What has happened before could actually happen again.
Torn between "what if it goes wrong?"
And "what if it doesn't?"
Giving my all and being left with nothing...again.
Nope.
I can't risk it.
He'll realize I'm holding back
And I wont lie and say that I'm not.
I'm thinking about calling a therapist
Just to be sure my feelings are accurate.